Things I Never Thought I'd Ever Say

WEATHER
"It's only -20C? Heat wave!"
"It's too warm to wear my parka, I'm walking home in a sweater." (In February in Rankin, after eating maktak.)
"It's a dry cold. -30C isn't so bad."
"My fingers hurt, I got freezer burn again." (This is what I call the intense feeling of pain one feels when putting bare flesh on outdoor metal.)
"No, it's only June. There's still snow."
"I can't believe they're tobogganing...it's June."

CULTURE
"Is it just me or is this dog sled kinda slow?"
"Do you think they'll be serving maktak? I really want maktak. With some soya sauce, mmmm!"
"Will you take a photo of me in the igloo?"
"I can't pick anymore berries...my fingers are frozen stiff."

PRICES
"$4 for a 2L of Pepsi? Oh my god! SO CHEAP!"
"$6 for a beer? Wow, what a deal!"
"So $12 gets you a KFC Big Crunch and fries? Seems reasonable I guess."

TRAVEL
"Do you think you'll be home from Repulse Bay tonight?"
"I went to Igloolik, Chesterfield Inlet, and Repulse Bay in one day...for free!"
"I'm only bringing 4 Rubbermaid totes back with me plus my suitcase."
"What do you MEAN my suitcase is over 70lbs?"
"I got my return ticket for $1400...super cheap."

ODDITIES OF NORTHERN LIVING
"If you're going to Yellowknife, can you pick me up some rum?"
"Did the plane come in? I want my rum!"
"I wanted to buy milk but everywhere in town was sold out."
"No, polar bears do not wander around my neighbourhood."
"I know it's only November but if I don't mail these Christmas cards asap, they won't make it in time."
"Wow, my Internet is actually kind of tolerable. This 3 minute YouTube video only took 5 minutes to download."
"I'll drive the [Honda/SkiDoo]!"
"What time is it? Midnight? Oh, it's still bright out. I thought it was only 7ish."
"I can't keep my window open at night...I live next to White Row."

SHIPPING
"Wow, only one week for that package to arrive? From Ontario?!"
"Did somebody say FREE SHIPPING!?"
"I order my shampoo and conditioner online."